TEMPLE SHOLOM NEWSLETTER
JANUARY 2025
TEVET / SHEVAT 5785
SPRINGFIELD, OH

~ RABBI'S CORNER ~

WHEN G-D WINKS...

Recently, a good friend of mine had to move out of her house because of a toxic family situation. To the ubiquitous verbal abuse she endured from her stepdaughter was added an episode of physical shoving. That her husband, the woman's father, was silent through this episode was the last straw. The situation was serious enough that, even if my friend would have chosen to stay and try to work things out, her family would have none of it, and if necessary, would have ''dragged her out'' of that situation.
As often happens, the victim of abuse may need to leave/escape but not really know where to go. Fortunately, there are shelters for folks who need to get out of situations of domestic abuse. In this case, my friend had a friend with whom she had stayed after her first marriage ended. Her friend has some health issues and needs someone to stay with her to provide a bit of extra care and attention. Responding to this ''win-win,'' my friend, a religious woman, told me: ''G-d was certainly looking out for both Alice (not her friend' real name) and me. He may have closed a door, but He certainly opened a window. She's getting what she needs and I'm getting what I need!''
Her words suggested to me that this fortuitous occurrence may have been what some folks call a ''G-d wink.''
What exactly is a ''G-d wink''?
''G-d wink'' is a term coined by Squire Bushnell, former president and CEO of ABC Television Network and author of the book When G-d Winks at You: How G-d Speaks to You Through the Power of Coincidence. It is ''an event or personal experience, often identified as coincidence, so astonishing that it is seen as a sign of divine intervention, especially when perceived as the answer to a prayer.''
Of course, people who believe in, or even entertain the possibility of, ''G-d winks'' tend to be people who believe that there is a Deity who really does care about the welfare of His creatures. By definitions, atheists don't share such interpretations of favorable coincidences, and agnostics might need some convincing.
Personally speaking, a particular experience I had several years ago pushed me from''I'm certainly open to the possibility'' to ''Yep, I believe in them'':
In 2005, I was in Chicago to interview for the position of Director of Religious Life for the Council of Jewish Elderly. I arrived mid-afternoon the day before my interview, which was scheduled for the following afternoon. At the time, my daughter was living in Chicago, and we planned to meet for dinner that evening. In the meantime, I had a couple of free hours. It was mid-July, and I was tired and hot from the trip and didn't feel like concentrating on the book I was reading. So...I got it into my head (from an angel?) to try to track down an old high school girlfriend with whom I had been very much in love.
I had originally met her when we were 13 and her family had moved to Houston, but they moved back to Chicago a couple of months after we first met. We somehow reconnected during our senior year in high school and had a long-distance summer romance until both of us began college in 1969. During a visit to Chicago in the summer of 1972 (right before I entered rabbinical school), I looked her up again and we had coffee. During our conversation we caught up: I told her I had switched career choices from becoming a doctor to becoming a rabbi. She told me she was engaged. We wished each other well and had no contact for 33 years.
With my curiosity getting the best of me, I succeeded in finding her parents' number in the phone book (when such things still existed). I dialed the number (and yes, my heart was beating a bit faster). Her mother answered; and, when I told her who I was, she screamed and almost dropped the phone. We had a very pleasant 10-minute ''catch up'' conversation, which concluded by her telling me that she would tell her daughter that I had called.
Ten minutes later, my phone rang. We arranged to have coffee the next morning. The conversation was mostly about the preceding 33 years: our respective families, careers...and marital status. She was in the middle of a divorce, and I had already been divorced for several years.
I got the job and moved to Chicago in the fall of 2005. We started dating; and although the job in the Windy City didn't work out as I had planned, I did return to central Ohio the following summer with ''the one that got away.'' Long story short: Sheryl and I just celebrated our 17th anniversary. And ...shortly after we started dating again, she introduced me to the idea of the ''G-d wink.''
Had I decided to go back to reading my book after checking in to that hotel room in July, 2005, both of our lives would be very different indeed.
But we both believe that G-d winked at us.
And we're grateful.
I know my friend is also grateful.
Hope you'll also have occasion to be grateful for the same reason.
-Rabbi Cary Kozberg

~ CONTRIBUTIONS ~
-A very generous donation in memory of Stan Nedelman from Charles Swaney

SPECIAL
-A Holiday donation honoring Eddie Leventhal from Andy Bell

SILVER
In memory of my husband Frank from Bobbi Mugford

JEFFREY D EBNER YOUTH FUND
-In memory of Karen from Lyla Bailin

CONDOLENCES TO...
The family of Dick Ebner, who passed away on December 30 in Huntsville Ohio. Dick had been a member of Temple Sholom for more than 30 years. A memorial service and celebration of life will be held at his home on Saturday, January 4 beginning at 1:00 p.m.
May his memory be always for a blessing

~ YAHRZEIT LIST ~
JAN 3: Sarah Endelman, Bernice Jean Gerson, Morris M. Gold, Toby Katz, Maxine Leventhal, Erie Maybruck, Clara Mendelson, Harry Sachs, Siegfried Sander, Sam Schechter, Emma Schoenthal, Manuel L. Soble, Oscar Werber, Samuel Farber, Lillian Leventhal, Shirley Unger Leventhal, Mary Schoemer, Arthur Turyn (father of Larry Turyn)

JAN 10: Natalie Cornez, Jacob Kleeman, Anne Reich Krauss, Rose Krauss, Abraham Schechter, Antonio Espinoza, Jr. (brother of Rose Weiss)

JAN 17: Lilly Balicer, Beryl Kaufman, Sylvia Rubinoff, Sonia Schechter, Arjae Kurtzhant (father of Itzca Zohar), Nellie Marenberg (mother of Gerald Marenberg), Wendy Michele Bard Mesmer (sister of Priscilla Dixon), Lillian Nedelman, Barrie Richardson (brother of Laurel Richardson), Rachel Zohar, Rae Zoldan

JAN 24: Harry B. Hoffman, Dora Long, Ruth Maybruck, Sophie Rubinoff, Bernard C. Zitsman, Gail Genieve Banks Buerki (mother of Bob Buerki), Samuel Draisen, Dr. Eric Friedland, Ethel Grodner (mother of Jack Grodner), Hyman Kohn, Miriam Kurland, Lester Lind (father of Bobbi Mugford)

JAN 31: Lois Bernstein, Louis Broock, Fannie B. Frand, Rosa Gardner, Max D. Gross, Tilly L. Levy, Nelson B. Paris, Ida Florence Zitsman, Robert Arthur Buerki (father of Bob Buerki), Harry Shapiro (father of Jerome Shapiro)

FEB 7: Joseph Gardner, Adolph D. Haas (father of Sandy Silverstein), Max Kleeman, Nathan Klein, Bonita S. Krauss (mother of Rick Krauss), Sophie K. LeBolt, Jennie Prusiner, Mary J. Rubin, Jack J. Schechter, Mattie Weixelbaum, Henry R. Ennis (father of Barbara Willens), Mildred Naft, Bertram Unger